
Along with Lineage’s supported device list. That’s how I’ve shopped my phones for years.
https://wiki.lineageos.org/devices
GSMarena and Phonearena have been excellent sites.

Well I don’t watch it, I don’t watch anyone’s, as they take 4-10 times longer to explain something than I can read it. I would’ve never learned this otherwise, so I’m glad he wrote it up, and linked to his source:
Speaking on his YouTube channel (emphasis mine).
I mean really, what more can you ask for than clearly giving credit?
There’s no comparison between the two.
iOS - you can do only what Apple says you can do.
Android - whatever you want, mostly. And so many devs working on it outside of Google, it’s only a matter of time before Google’s restrictions are undone.
Keep in mind, people outside Google have worked on it for 15 years now. There’s a lot of non-Google expertise.
But… Whether it’s worth it is up to you. I use an iPhone for work, because they manage it so I can’t do anything beyond what they permit, even if it’s an Android. I need to make calls and use the tools the company provides. So iPhone. It’s simple, it “just works”.
But for personal, I do a lot of stuff that simply isn’t possible on iOS.

I have a Pixel, I don’t have this problem, and I run it hard. Switch apps extensively, have ~250 user apps, rooted, numerous service apps (Foldersync, Syncthing, Resilio Sync, 2 versions of Telegram, Teleguard, 2 XMPP clients, VPN), etc, etc. The apps I want kept alive stay alive, the ones I don’t care about get hibernated when Android decides to.
OP is using Graphene, I’m using Lineage, both start from AOSP. There’s something overly aggressive in Graphene battery optimization config.

That’s interesting, and surprising. Graphene doesn’t do anything special with battery optimization, does it (I didn’t think it did)?
Have you asked on any Graphene chats (they use discord and telegram, right?).
I’ve used Greenify for 10+ years to manage hibernation, but it really only works well with root, and the Graphene folks aren’t down with root… So the only thing I can think to look at is how battery optimization is configured per app (and the “don’t keep activities” setting in Developer Options).
Edit: look in Developer Options for “Background Check”, here you can select which apps can run in the background.
I’m running a Pixel with Lineage and battery optimization works fine. Graphene starts with AOSP like Lineage does, surely they aren’t doing anything weird with battery optimizing?

You need to change battery optimization for the affected apps (well, the apps you don’t want hibernated instantly).
Some brands of phones have aggressive hibernation config for all apps by default (Samsung, Xiomi I think).
Lookup hibernation control for your brand of phone.
Also check out https://dontkillmyapp.com/
What’s a sam’s ung?
Lineage is the metric, for the most part, and I don’t see it there.
You’re probably best off just running the Universal Debloat Tool, or just get a phone that’s on the Lineage list.
Get the Universal Android Debloat Utility, it’s pretty good at letting you know what can be disabled.

This all started 15+ years ago.
I vaguely recall this transition with a Call of Duty game, when you could no longer host your own, for a game where that really wasn’t necessary, unlike MMORPG.
And today with the high bandwidth home connections, hardware capability, or even just using a VPS, you could still host with appropriate performance.

You can disable any app using ADB. See here to disable messages.
Though this is a reason I run AOSP (Lineage, Graphene) and root my phones. I keep SMS apps disabled (in the US we have stupid emergency alerts that are never relevant to me that come through the SMS system.)

Ouch, an Xperia 1 IV is a bit pricey, best I can find is about $300. As a comparison, my current Pixel 5 is about $150. (Yea, not comparable phones at all, but for my use-case it doesn’t matter).
Nice phone though, thanks for the recommendation - I’m always looking for my next bootloader unlocked phone. Other than being glass backed (which I’m willing to live with, but what’s so wrong with plastic!!) the Xperia line looks great.

No, it doesn’t, or we wouldn’t have all the reports of malware on phones.
It simply isn’t possible for all those reports to be only from the tiny fraction of people who sideload.
Play protect has been around for what, ten years now, the play store has tons of malicious apps, yet people still get malware.
As a final thought, why is protection from malicious apps from the play store being performed on the phone instead of in the store?
And you can still root Graphene - they just don’t support it